Thursday, February 4, 2010

Just Breathe

Just Breathe.
I tell myself this when I’m nerve before a crowd of people, or when I’m in a very small room, just breath. Take a breath look at the situation with both eyes open; take it in, digest it, and process it. There are lessons in the fears. Lately, I have been wonder why do we as women don’t support each other. I’m learned it doesn’t matter what color we are, age, we just don’t support each other as women. It like something was embedded in our spirit to keep it all for ourselves, or just for the ones who carried the same “stuff” we got (so we think). On my journey toward getting my book series publishing, and started my company I have been looking for a mentor, I want a successful, powerful, strong woman. Someone who started out and won the race. Someone who can teach me my words and dreams are so much more than just that. I can’t find one for the life of me. It’ all about who you know, and where you come from but we as a people co-sign that book of life. The only person I know is I, my God, and where I’m from, everywhere. Pieces of my dreams come from all part of the world. I need a female mentor telling me that this thinking can really happen for someone like me. Because today, last night, and maybe tomorrow I don’t feel like these is going to happen. Every day I wake up trying to do everything I can to make this happen faith without works is dead. But what do I do? At this point no more contests to apply for, you- tube video, and blog comments. I’m tired of talking about my dreams. I’m tired of dream about them each night they are getting bigger, better now; then I wake up and nothing. People who I know who really Love me make me feel like this is as much going to happen for someone like me. Just writing them, but I know this books are powerful. I ‘m nothing special, in the eyes of some I’m not a singer, ball player, or model so my chance of someone discover me is not going to happen. It sad when someone like me feel the only way something good can happen to me is by being a singer, ball player, or model. I believe in my books, and my gift of words but it feel sometime like a dream. I’m scary, and sad that this is not going to happen. I am working so, so hard to put them on the market, book store, ad and big billboard. All I need is one yes, just that one yes. I know it coming; it’s on it way at this very moment. I’m all over the places today but my words never change be free, and keep on keeping on. A change is coming……

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